Today I did a segment regarding this on Canada's biggest talk radio station. The host who is a great guy still wondered how Carolyn Moos didn't know. He asked me if women really don't know or ignore the signs.
For the millions of straight wives and girlfriends in America and for the millions more around the world, all I can say is, "WHY, WHY, WHY?" Why do people think for a moment that we are so desperate to have a man that we would just ignore those gay signs? People ask us this question all of the time. "Didn't you know? Couldn't you tell? Were you just turning away from the obvious?"
The answer of course is a resounding "NO" in almost every case. How would we know? We fall in love with someone who seems to love us, wants to marry us, have a family with us. Most of them are able to perform satisfactorily in bed--at least in the beginning when they want us. What makes this gay?
People don't understand that gay men who marry are masters of disguise. They practice the "straight act" every day of their lives. They look like a "straight man," talk like a "straight man," and say all the right things like a "straight man." They are wonderful actors. When you live a lie every single day of your life, it is easy to fool people. Heck, they even fool themselves.
Nothing personal, but I'm tired of straight wives taking responsibility for not knowing that they were walking into a relationship with a gay man. We are not "desperate straight wives," but rather loving and caring women who believe in the love our husbands promised us forever. Please stop wondering what we knew--because almost all of us knew NOTHING.